THE EASIEST WAY TO FATTEN UP YOUR ASS

Have you ever wanted to know a quick and easy way to fatten up your ass?  I didn’t- but I sure learned the hard way.  Always in search of a quick and non dangerous item to satisfy my sweet tooth, I regularly troll the aisles of candy stores and markets.  The other day, Husband brought home a jar of something that resembled Peanut Butter from Trader Joe’s.  I shook my head as I dove into a disgusting sugar fee jello pudding.  I sat at the table proud of my will power as I watched him devour nearly the entire jar.  I kindly reminded him that the last few months had not been good to his waistline….  And then I gave in to his begging that I taste his latest find.  A half a jar a night of this crazy addicting orgasmic Speculoos Cookie Butter  has killed any effort that I had put forth on my New Year’s resolution of the Dukan Diet.  So much for the hope that this “spread” would not spread my ass.  What a waste of eating protein all day long to then top it off with this “deliciously unusual spread reminiscent of gingerbread and made with crushed biscuits.”   Watch out, Sippers!  This is one hot item at Trader Joes and is known to be out of stock.  Here’s to self control!  (As I type this post, I am drooling over my spoon of cookie butter.)  Guess I will start a diet tomorrow.

 

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